Drained

Day 14: Go Pats, originally uploaded by ConfessionalPoet.

There's a reason my jersey looks like this after three Super Bowls, three wild-card playoff games, and five division playoff games. The playoffs, for the truly insane sports fan, are not "fun."

The playoffs, rather, are a time for hyperventilating into paper bags, clutching at one's jersey, biting one's nails, swearing loudly, IMing "FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK" to people, and worrying. Lots of worrying.

There is also usually some good eating, which helps, but really, in my experience, having a team in the playoffs isn't fun until it's all over, and you can go back and watch on DVD or YouTube or whatever you prefer.

Anyway, the key, I think, as my heart rate heads back toward normal and I can think back to what actually happened, was the first Patriots touchdown of the game--as Brady walked off the field after bringing the team within 4 before the teams retired into the locker room, my dad said, "The legend of Brady grows."

And he deserves credit, for pulling himself together despite the fact that something was clearly off today--whether mental or physical, a number of his throws were just plain shitty. Three interceptions doth not a stellar game make. Three interceptions against the No. 1 seed usually equals a loss. But it's like my dad says, "I'd rather be lucky than good any day."

(My dad has also requested that I write here in capital letters the words "NEVER A DOUBT", as his message to the world.)

In the end, though, luck probably made at least as much of a difference as having Brady on our side; these two teams, though one was heavily favored, turned out to play each other exactly even. The Chargers offense was as challenging as advertised, but the Patriots defense, though there were stupid errors and flubbed plays that drove my blood pressure into the red zone, never, ever, ever, ever gave up. And so it was, admittedly, luck that made the difference--neither team had a true edge over the other. But the Patriots put themselves in the best position to both incur and capitalize on that luck with their sheer determination.

A great example of this was the series that actually led to San Diego's first touchdown. Beginning on the New England 48, Tomlinson dinked and dunked, 5 yards, 4 yards, and then it was 3rd and 1.

From the beginning of this drive I was tearing my hair out--it was enough to set off my pessimism that San Diego so far were winning the field position war, and the Patriots had been held to a stupid field goal. When, on 3rd and 1, what by rights was a fumble and recovery by New England right near the goal line was reversed by this game's absolutely pathetic officiating crew, I was entering full-on despair.

It is a good thing I don't play for the Patriots. Or coach for them. Or have anything to do with them so the players can hear, because I had thrown in the towel.

The defense, on the other hand, held off the Chargers for another two plays, even when they were lining up just across their own goal line. Eventually, LT would score. In the end it was true: San Diego had been winning the battle for field position, and working with their multitude of offensive weapons, were capitalizing. It was not a good moment to be a Pats fan.

But luckily the actual Patriots don't think the way I think. They keep pushing and keep fighting. Even in another standout moment, after a long completion on the Chargers' opening drive of the fourth quarter to the New England 3, Ellis Hobbs and Artrell Hawkins made a last desperate effort to stop the receiver--shades of Benjamin Watson v. Champ Bailey (or so I thought--I was still, of course, pessimistic).

And in the end, maybe it ws luck, maybe it was the determination, maybe it was a little bit of both. Maybe we've forgotten over the last couple of years that this, in the end, is Patriots football--football that leaves the pundits squabbling and puzzling. Whatever that magic mixture--dare I call it..."Mystique"?--it was surely at work on the ultimate turning point of the game, the interception, the strip by Troy Brown and the immediate fumble to return it to the Patriots, who seized up the ball again as if it had been planned that way and scored--not only a touchdown, but, to follow, a two-point conversion.

The pivotal moment there isn't even necessarily the touchdown and two points--that was the follow-through. It was the moment that Troy Brown, seeing the ball picked off, attacked Marlon McCree without even the slightest hesitation. This you can know by the fact that had he paused even for a second, even to think to himself, "damn," McCree would've been by him, your final score is 21-13 Chargers, and I'm writing here about how I knew all day, all week even, that we'd probably lose this one.

Those moments, moments where it's Troy Brown and Marlon McCree and the ball, moments where to believe isn't even a choice but an unconscious behavior--those are what Patriots football is about. Those moments are why I'll be wearing that battered jersey till it literally falls apart--even if I'm about as good at that kind of believing as I am at running a post pattern.

It's been quite a round of games so far, too--several people have commented on that this weekend. I can only imagine that the next round will be proportionately more intense, what with a Pats-Colts rematch and the feel-good Saints taking on the dominant Bears.

Frankly, I can't really even imagine it at this point.

Comments

[SoxontheBeach]

I can't even think straight - this game was such a mindblower. Thank god I have an entire week to rest up for the next game!

Meanwhile...back to the Jameson's.

[Emma]

//Eventually, LT would score. In the end it was true: San Diego had been winning the battle for field position, and working with their multitude of offensive weapons, were capitalizing. It was not a good moment to be a Pats fan.//

It really surprised me in the 4th quarter ( or maybe it was the third), when they announced that LT had his 100-yard game. Because, he was getting those 7-10 yard runs, and by then he had both of his touchdowns. But it seemed like that expression, we couldn't completely stop him, but we could hope to contain him. He got his stats, but there was no real moment when he seemed to drive a stake through the heart of the Pats. No real game-breaker. And I guess that's to the immense credit of our defense.

And also: He was SUCH a sulky crybaby after the game. My god.

[beth]

emma, he was, but my biggest objection to that was not anything he said but the fact that for at least the next couple of days, the discussion everywhere is going to be debate over that--it's all going to be about him. so i've been trying to avoid even mentioning it here.

for what it's worth, though, yes, he was a sore loser--it's like kevin faulk said to him after the game, "come on, LT, you're better than that." but he's a young kid, he was frustrated and disappointed and honestly i think it shouldn't be dwelled upon.

because hey, i can't imagine a better outcome from that game than to see LT up there afterwards crying about what a mean man belichick is. :-)

[Dawn]

thank God we have a week to recover before we do this again. and while the coming game doesn't scare me *quite* as much as the one we just scratched & clawed our way out of, it still scares me sufficiently.

here's hoping my heart rate slows some time before Sunday. and if we somehow find it in us to get another win in Indy, i suspect the crying coming from Peyton will make Tomlinson look like he shrugged the whole thing off.

ugh. i hate that it comes down to the the Patriots & the Colts. *anyone* but the Colts.

[Iain]

I thought the 'class' argument from a team that basically tried to shut opposing fans out of the game was quite amusing.

[charger fan]

Charger fan here. Congratulations to the Patriots, one of sports' classic dynasties. The Chargers made too many mistakes, and the Patriots--power to them--took advantage. The best team on Sunday won.

That said, we have always dealt with huge numbers of opposing fans, as this is a tourist city, a transplant city, and our team has not been very successful. I would guess there were a lot of empty seats in Foxboro when the Patriots sucked. Some Boston-area fans, also, are right up there with anyone on the obnoxiousness scale. Defensive + entitled. So, while I can see the complaints about the policy, it is not that big of a deal and I would just as soon NE locals in SD watch at the sports bars.

As far as Tomlinson, football is an emotional game and he was upset. The story out here is that the Patriot DBs--none of whom can carry Tomlinson's jockstrap on a football field--talked some smack to get it started. In the intensity of a tough playoff game, it happens.

This is a great blog, by a great writer, and you have a great team. No need to take shots at the Chargers and their fans.

[beth]

i appreciate your gracious comment, charger fan. and the points you raise are a good example of why the LT tempest in a teapot didn't originally make this blog in the post above.

as for the ticket thing, i just am going to have to disagree with you. yes, there were empty seats when the patriots weren't doing well--but when they did start to do well the patriots didn't restrict ticket sales to the new england region. they never have. there are definitely bandwagon fans, sure, and despite the valid points you raise about being a "transplant" city, it still makes the chargers look like they're afraid of new england and afraid of new england's fans to institute that rule. saying this also does not, i would point out, amount to a refutation that Boston fans can be obnoxious or a claim that we're all saintly around here. clearly the chargers still made the decision they felt was best, knowing, i'm sure, the message it might send--but seeing it as the way to give the team the best chance to win and the hell with what we think. fine. but we can't be expected to like it, or think it's fair, or not say so.

anyway, i can't speak for everyone who visits the site, but i personally am not all that interested in an extended pissing match over this game now that it's over. what's done is done, and the debates and wouldacouldashouldas and criticisms are for san diego to sort out at this point, not us, imo.

[charger fan]

Fair enough. I don't think it is a case of being "afraid" however. More like a case of "leave us alone." That said, in a town like this, with great weather all-year round, the team needs to be good to draw and the Chargers's fan base is thin. Loyalty develops through extended success. We will see if what happens--they may think they need to can Schottenheimer to get the stadium financed..

I can't see NE losing in Indianapolis on Sunday, although I am sure that visions of a GW FG by Vinateri will haunt you all week. =)

Take care and good luck.

[Dawn]

omg. that Vinatieri comment by "charger fan" is about as good a subtle dig as they come! ;-) LOL! i've been saying since Sunday night that i would rather have lost in San Diego than to lose to the Colts in the AFC Champsionship game.

the only thing more disturbing than the idea of losing to The Best Foot Ever is the mental image given to me by a colleague: "What would you do if Peyton Manning became a Patriot?" i had to bleach my mind's eye after that one.

[LeOgAhEr]

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